True North

Sorry this is such a downer.  But it is a truthful look at where I am at today, in this moment. 

True North

By Julie Meyer-Weber

October 15, 2011

When I lose my way

I look to You, Lord

For You have set my course

When I disorient

Tossed and sinking in waves of regret

You are the way to solid ground

You are my True North

Where are you Lord?

I look to the heavens

The stars are shrouded by clouds

Clouds of confusion

Vapors of regret

A haze of pain and anger and doubt.

I know You are there

But I wander in distress

Where is my True North?

I just want a break.

A clearing in this darkness

How long O Lord?

Will it rain, rain rain?

Will the tempest ravage my soul?

When can I see You again?

Where, o where is my True North?

This is a post from a friend of mine, Scott Small.  I am posting here with his permission.  I personally am so encouraged by his life, his passion and his love for others.  I hope that you too will be blessed by what he has shared.  If you are reading this, Scott, love ya, bro!  Thanks for sharing so much of your beautiful self with this little place we call earth.

Scott Small

I posted this on my wall earlier and thought I'd share it here:
Kay and I have been through some heavy tribulations together; we've buried a son, Joshua Taylor Small. He would be 22 now. Kay almost died giving birth to Robbie. She lost over 80% of the blood in her body and had to have 14 units transfused. They came out and told me to call the family, because she was not going to make it, but I ran to the chapel at the hospital and started praying aloud so hard that people started praying right there with me.  Both her and him made it, but they told us Robbie would never recognize us, and that he would be in a vegetative state for life. Again we prayed hard. Robbie just got his 1st report card from high school it was 3 A's and 2 B's. I was nearly cut into and in a induced coma on life support for 72 days following a near fatal motorcycle crash. The doctors wanted to remove life support and let me die, telling Kay I was too injured to ever have any kind of life, and that I needed to be put out of my misery. But Kay did not give up hope. She and many others prayed relentlessly for weeks, and after 6 months hospitalized and years of therapy, I now feel back. Never ever give up. Have faith, and realize that the tribulations we all face in life can make us stronger individually and as a couple if we have faith. Although I wish our life had been different, I would not change a thing. All of our tribulations in life happen for a purpose, so keep the faith, always look for the silver linings and NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
Also, Scott wrote this, which I think fits in so well here.
Life i love you
with all your cruelty
with all your gentleness
on your terms
nothing guaranteed
everything invested
face to face
one on one
i will not hide
nor shall you
come what may
i will fight to stay with you
my unrequited lover.
by scott small